A_Burn
Shared on Mon, 09/25/2006 - 13:06 Yesterday I took my two younger daughter’s (they are 10 and almost 13) to their cousin's birthday party. That in itself is fine, we gave presents, sang "Happy Birthday" and ate cake. We had a wonderful time. The interesting or disturbing part was prior to doing all this we drove to the local indoor, super consumer, we'll suck your soul right out of you, buy this product that you don't need meeting place, aka the Mall. We took this sojourn for one reason. My sweet little niece who turned 6, wanted to go to Build a Bear for her birthday. My brother in law, who being the good, loving and doting father that he is couldn't say no to his little princess.
I just want to say for the record I hate malls. All malls. They are loud, crowded, consumerist nightmares. Everything from the nasty food court, the BO, the faux neo Grecian architecture, the dizzying colors, fake plants, the background Muzak to the windows of the shops screaming at you to come on in and Buy! Buy! Buy! You can smell the credit card debt as well as the charred remains of the lost souls that still float aimlessly about the place looking for the next "BIG SALE". This is also the haven for all pre-teen and teenage girls. Whether its Hot Topic, Forever 21, Spencers, Disney Store or whichever overpriced "music" store that happens to have a contract with said mall. All parents get that cringe (or they should) when they hear Mommmmm or DaaaaDDDDD can I have (insert name of useless thing or overpriced clothing here). PLEASEEEE!!! This also where you will see some spoiled kid throwing a tantrum, screaming and wailing while their "parent" drags them through the store that we are all trying to shop in, instead of taking them outside where they belong. Now don't get me wrong, I do end up shopping at the malls when I have too, when I can't get what I need elsewhere or Xmas time(lets not even mention holidays), and there are some small things that are good about malls, Victoria's Secret, The Body Shop or Bath and Body works depending on which mall you're at and the video game shop(browsing only, never buying), the occasional good shoe store and lets not forget good ole' Barnes & Noble or Borders.
And now there is the newest, latest, greatest addition to the consumer institutions, brought to you straight from the 7th level of Hell.... Build a Bear (BaB).
Right in the middle of the mall is this cross between McDonald's and Disney. (Just so you know, there are both a McD's and BaB inside Disneyland) Its all plastic, brightly colored, and fake. Even the employees wear uniforms straight from Disneyland! You can even host your BaB birthday party there! Fun for the whole family! There are bins of empty, cute, pre-made bear/bunny/dog carcasses for you to choose from, costing you from $12- $16 each. After you pick one, you stand in line. This line is usually long, especially on a weekend. While you stand there waiting, there is another bin to catch your attention. This bin has the little electronic sound makers that you can include in the making of your bear, anything from laughing, to your voice, to a satanic voice repeating "You must kill Mommy and Daddy" over and over again. O.K., I made that last one up, but that at least would be interesting. These things are $5/piece or 3 for $10 or something like that. On a personal note, I was standing there with my Mother and Father in law, Brother in law and his wife and 5 kids. To pass the time and the uncomfortable ness (my brother in law hates malls more than I do, ahh a father's love.) we started on all the bear puns that came to mind. "This is un-Bearable", "I can't Bear this anymore." "Please Bear in mind this is a place of business." "I can Bearly stand this anymore." "This store Bears some more inspection." etc. We also started twisting my mother in laws words for our own selfish benefit, something about Amoebas and Dysentery but I can't really remember. But it Bear-ly had an effect on her!" (I'll stop now). What was I talking about? Oh yea, standing in line. So you stand and stand and stand (I'm still waiting for the fun part). When you finally get in sight of the Stuffing machine, picture a large, long, glass popcorn machines from the count fair full of white fluffy stuff. On the working end, there is a large what looks like a hypodermic needle about 1 inch in diameter sticking out. They keep this covered when not in use with a large red plastic fake cork. Safety First! They use this needle by shoving the empty carcass that you picked onto it. This is where the child "participation" comes in. Once it is impaled onto the huge syringe, the employee asks the child whether they want their animal to be soft or firm. Then they tell the child to step onto a foot pedal to make the stuffing go into the bear(the child is not touching the bear at all at this point). When the kid steps onto the pedal, the employee turns a little switch on, fluff starts to fly around inside the popcorn cart and stuffing starts to fill the bear.(reminded me of a colonoscopy gone really bad). When the bear is full, they don't tell the kid to stop stepping on the pedal, they turn off the switch. Now here's where the magic comes in. The child gets to pick out a little fabric heart, either solid red or red/white checkered one. The employee then tells them to make a wish on the heart, then put the heart on their forehead so the bear "will be smart like you.", then they have to jump up and down once or twice to "start the heart", (I personally would have love to see some kid's heart actually start beating in his hand at this point AAAHHHHHHHH!) then they put the heart into the bear and the employee closes it up. Fun Fun Fun! But we're not done yet, not by a long shot. Your going to be here for another 20 to 30 minutes Skippy! First you have to go through the clothing/costuming area where kids can pick out all sorts of fun clothes or costumes for their bear. They can even dress up their bear in a Winnie the Poo costume for Halloween! You can even buy a wig for your bear so you can brush and braid its hair. This is the same area that they have a bank of computers lined up so you can make an official adoption certificate that prints out for you at no extra cost… except after you/child inputs all of their personal info: Name, Address, Phone #, email, and birth date. Can anyone say free marketing? I can just see the junk mail and Spam in my daughters’ inboxes. Grrrrr. So after you give them all of your information (I’m surprised they didn’t ask for blood type and SS #) you can proceed to the check out so you can pay for all this fun.
Now the idea of a place where kids can go for a fun, (the Gods forbid) educational, and different experience is great. I'm all for it. They can even come away with a teddy bear that they helped make. What an experience. A kid would remember that forever. There is such a place in San Francisco, http://www.basicbrownbear.com/ . This place has been there, giving tours of an actual factory and letting kids see bears getting designed and made. They even get to learn about the history of the Teddy Bear, as well as make a bear of their own. And yes, they have costumes and clothes for your bear as well. They have been doing this for more than 25 years! Freaking Amazing! My 2 older girls have been there for Girl Scouts, school field trips, parties and such and they absolutely loved it. On top of all that, you also get that personal touch that only comes from a small business.
One of the best things about this place, it is a locally owned business that supports the local community. It’s not a huge corporate, conglomerated, soulless behemoth. There is only one, which makes a visit there all the more memorable. It also makes the quality better. So if your thinking of going to BaB, please think about it first, and look and see if there is a more of a Mom and Pop business in your area that will do the same thing. They will probably even do it better than BaB. This also translates to the other things you buy. Instead of buying from the above mentioned Barnes& Noble and Borders, buy from a local book store first. Instead of buying or renting from Hollywood or Blockbuster go to the local shop, Yes I know they don’t have the greatest selection, but I’ll guarantee they will have some funkier stuff. Use Netflix over Blockbuster, Netflix is still owned and run by the original people that started it and they do a better job. Look at Codemonkey, he and his wife are starting their own business, buy from them if you can, it supports our 2o2p community.
Wow this got long, I just wanted to rant about Build a Bear. Ok. I’m stepping down from my soap box now.
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Submitted by LadyisRed on Mon, 09/25/2006 - 13:30
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Submitted by A_Burn on Mon, 09/25/2006 - 15:18