I am going to start my own fawking island...one where I am King and I do what I want. This island will consist of

1. ME

2. A rotating Herohm of hot chicks

3. The best in dark and lite beer

4. All the cigars in the world (Sorry fawkers I get them you go smoke your little pansy CIGARettes...bwahahaa)

5. A castle

My castle shall consist of the newest technology...not this passsed down from the military 25 years ago pentium computer bullshit I want the lightspeed chip sets they are using now and the 5th generation stealth camo so I can sneak up on my sleeping hot chicks and ....well thats for the king to know and you to imagine. I also want a fucking speed boat...A fast mother with a open bar year round and I will decree different shit all night long and if something I say is wrong later then I will also decree that I am king and you will have to listen....but wait you werent invited....what are you doing on my island? Get the hell out of here before I decree you into a steaming pile of half eaten, half cooked Steak Ums....damn I loved those...always did always will even though they are made from the skin of cow testicles. I have decided tonight that I can drink far more lite beers and stand up to boast than I can dark beers. This is very new news to me so hold back the FAWKING I TOLD YOU SO'S ,...PLEASE!

I have found great pleasure in drinking light beer...not only do I get to visit the water closet more but I actually can water the whole closet thanks to new water infused lite beer technology. Thanks to Coors I now am a living specticule of art meets human water fall. Thanks Coors....your da man...errr

You will pay evil hot ass bartender...you will pay!!

damn

so.....well.......aw fuck it.....and then.....uuuuhm.......wait I ...no I just had it...yep there it is...ahhh that feels nice

Dont jerk off ....jerk offs

Shit makes you go blind...cross eyed....weak at the knees and makes you wear womens undergarments. LOVE LIVE MELVIN

If you know who this guy is...you guessed it..your a masterbaiter

hahhaaa haaa spanky spankerton I hope you get caught. Speaking of which