Snickerdoodle

I don’t know… just like the word. The cookie? Not so much

This morning I thought I would log into WoW before work, do a little farming, make some gold.. you know, the standard stuff. I got too close to a mob, and whoa… trying to melee with my DK was so foreign. That is so weird to me, considering it had only been 10 days, but whatev.

What amazes me the most, I think, is how much fun Diablo is. At first I was like… okay, cool game. But now I really am enjoying it. Most especially when I actually run with people. Since I was down for a few days, quite a few are ahead of me, but hopefully I can do some coop with others this week.

One thing I do want to focus on, is the livestreaming. I’m using XSplit, which is an awesome program, but I know I am not using it to it’s full potential, so I need to buckle down and do some reading. I *think* that I can also record so that I can throw some videos together, but so far, the recordings are only like 7 seconds. Obviously I am doing something wrong lol

Aside from gaming, life has been getting a lot more interesting, and I wish I meant that in a good way. You know, I thought when my boys were raised, that responsibilities would lessen and I could get back to my personal life. Maybe everyone thinks that? I don’t know. The truth of the matter is, I couldn’t have been more wrong. Now comes the parental responsibility. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I don’t want to do things for my mom, but increasingly it’s become mentally and emotionally harder to do. We had a scare with her a few months ago, and now that all tests have been done (except one that is scheduled this week), she is pretty healthy for her age. Mentally though, I am seeing deterioration. Mind you, this is from my point of view. I’ve been spending a lot of time with her to make sure she walks as often as possible. We walk at least 2 miles and while her breathing isn’t up to speed yet, she is better in that regard, but omg, the things she says. Every time I see her, she tells me the same things verbatim. It’s like she doesn’t even remember what she said the day before. Her reasoning seems off, and I try very, very hard not to get frustrated with her. She made some comments about a couple of other family members that was so off that I was flabbergasted at what was coming out of her mouth. I was literally speechless. My nerves were already shot (will address that in a moment) so when I finally able to talk to her, the only thing I could say was “What happened to the woman who raised me? The one who doesn’t take crap off of no one, who raised us to be self-sufficient, and taught us to stand up for ourselves and actually THINK outside of the box?????” I was near tears, and that was when she apologized. There was no need for her to do that, I know she doesn’t realize what is going on. So now I need to do some reading on dementia (that is such an ugly word) and Alzheimer’s disease to see if she might be in the early stages of something. She had already signed paperwork that I could talk with her doctor, so after I try to determine if something might be happening, I will need to get in touch with him and see about how to proceed. The moment when a person realizes their parents are old and need taken care of, it breaks your heart. I mean really deep, heartfelt pain. So you cry, get it out of your system, put your big pants on and move ahead.

So now to why I was already on edge. I was going to write about that, but I’m not sure how many local people read my stuff, so it’s probably not a good idea. Suffice it to say, personally I have some major changes coming and I am pretty stressed about it. I am just thankful that I have gaming to go to in my downtime so that I can just give myself a break from all of it.

Enough gloom and doom. I’ve got quite a few projects to get done around the house, but as I looked at my backyard this morning and felt like I was in the amazon, I moved it up about 10 spots and realize I am going to have quite the farmers tan when it is all said and done. But it will be soooo pretty!

For now, back to work!