Well gag me with a spoon.

A plane crashes deep in the Amazon. The only survivors are a British Guy, A Mexican, and an American from the Bronx. The three are ambushed by a local tribe. They are told that unfortunately they have trespassed and are going to be put to death in front of the whole tribe. The only benefit the Chief tells the three is that their skin will be used to makes canoes and they will eat them.

The British guy says he wants to die with honor and takes cyanide.

The Mexican says that he wishes to be shot, so he is shot in the head.

Lastly the American says he wants a fork...

Then proceeds to start stabbing himself yelling Fuck your Canoes!!!!!!!!!