Drunk Dialing

So since the break up Karen has been texting me like crazy.  She's doing her whole manic depressive I love you, I hate you thing.  One minute she texts me to never contact her again.  Then a few hours later she's telling me that she still loves me.  Yesterday she sent me a text asking if we could go out together as friends.  I texted back that I had plans, which I did.  So while I was she just kept texting me.  Apparently she decided that she needed to get drunk last night.  I think that is what fueled all the texts last night.  My friends were all telling me not to talk to her.  To just ignore her.  I did try.  Finally late last night I called her because she said she needed to ask me something.  She said she couldn't move on until she understood why this happened.  She wanted to know why I told her I loved her if I really didn't.  She wanted to know why I wanted to break up.  So I told her that I felt like I did love her when I told her that but now I realize that I don't.  Then I told her that she was smoothering me with all the constant contact.  She was upset and said I should have just told her it ws too much so she could back off.  She's probably right about that.  I could have told her but I don't really think it would have made a difference.  It was like the more I got to know her the more I realized that we weren"t right for each other.  We were just too different.  I like to go out and do things.  She likes to stay home and watch sports on tv.  I hate sports. 

To be completely honest I knew she wasn't my type to start with.  I really wanted someone who was more girly.  I told my friend Scott that I was only going to talk to her just to see what would happen.  I've spent my life doing what I thought I should.  I deciced to do something contrary to the norn and see what happened.  So even though what I was looking for was not her I thought, maybe it will work.  So I gave it a try and it didn't work out.  I'm sorry she had to get hurt in the process but that happens sometimes.  I did my best to let her down easy.  I guess there is just no easy way to break up with someone when they are into you. 

I did find out why she sent my that crazy text message the day after my uncle died.  Apparently she seems to think that I gave her an STD.  She said that she got sores on her mouth and it must be my fault.  She thinks that I knew I had something and just didn't tell her.  So I had to tell her the same thing I told her when we met.  I got tested for all STDs back in January of 09.  All my tests were negative.  So as far as I know I don't have anything.  If I did I would not go around having sex with people and not telling them about it.  I actually had forgotten that I did have sex with one guy since then.  So I guess there is a chance that maybe I do have something I don't know about.  I am planning on going to see my doctor to get tested for everything again.  I'm past due anyway.  She's doing the same.  I honestly still don't think I have anything but if I do I'll own up to it and tell her.  My friend Stephani said that cancer can also cause leasions in the mouth (that's what she said she had) and Karen did say that her cancer is spreading all over her body.  We've only been sleeping together for like 3 weeks.  I don't think herpes would so up that fast.  I really hope I don't have it cuz that would be really fucked up.  I do think that if we were supposed to be in a relationship she should have just sat me down and told me what she thought.  Her plan was to ignore it until she went to the doctor and then if her test was positive spring it on me that I was a liar.  I think that's pretty childish.