Carrot Indifference

I’d rather be the carrot then the stick.  I rather have a stick than a carrot in a fight.  If I was starving I would rather have a carrot and if people were hungry I would rather be a stick.  I would be super stick man, or the human stick named for my polymers not my physique.  My motto would be: “Be nice or suck some adhesive!”  My pores would ooze a substance that would have bonding capabilities and I would have the dexterity to fling it at villains and stick them to walls or stick grenades to them or maybe stick them with really smelly food like cheese or dates digested by an Elephante!

 

I would say to kids: “Eat your veggies or I’ll stick them to your face or back where you will be nibbled on by an erratic and challenged wildebeest!”

 

The Wildebeest a flamboyant creature suited more for the valor of being a valet than living the endless migration of the copy slave into a conglomerate of such size that the back door is next to your house but the employee parking is 10 miles away, it’s so big nobody understands its financials!  It’s derivative portfolio has derivatives that have derivatives that have derivatives that have derivatives that have derivatives…it has so many futures in its portfolio that it has multiple pasts…its portfolio is so complex that the investment department bets on how much coffee the company’s employees will drink this month.  It has investments so small that the fine print of the 100 page contract can be put on the head a pin and it has investments so large I won’t even bother explaining it because it’s too big for your small human brain to understand!