Stream of consciousness, you get what I think.

Sit by and cry as the pack of wild dogs attacks not you but your double scoop chocolate ice cream cone.  They bark and growl as they follow you from vendor to vendor as every sweet treat you buy is pounced on and devoured in a writhing madness of canine indulgence.  You ask God why? God says because you signed the Weight Watchers contract.  God is tired of watching you fill your pie hole with junk food and booze.  God doesn’t want to lose you to Satan’s hunger.  It’s a new angelic program for the God Fearing who obviously don’t Fear enough.  God calls it African Wild Dog Scare-athon.  God maybe almighty but lacks a bit in the creative department…I mean look at people…two arms…two legs…one head.

 

Breaking in with the religious undertones of scripture and leather bound dusty books; do you ever go dust snorting at your local library?  You wander down into the lower levels where they keep the vintage engineering texts such as “Mechanical Engineering 101: How to build a wheel out of rock? Start with a Boulder.” and “Fire!: Nature’s Guide to Chemical Engineering” You pry open an old tome copyright 200 BC, language Aramaic, press you nose right into the middle of a book like it’s a sweet smelling soft red rose and breath in, sucking dust particle after dust particle directly into your lungs.  It’s a rush like no other knowing full well that you are 5 seconds away from laying on the floor for 15 minutes sneezing and coughing a lung out.

 

You can also go Shop snorting, I prefer a good wood shop preferably one that works primarily on oak.  I can’t wait to feel those tears of joy streaming down my face after filling my lungs with saw dust.  I suggest using a quick pour of mint oil or a dash cayenne pepper to really bring the experience home.