MAME Console Project Update & a little depression...

Gatsu

Shared on Mon, 03/26/2007 - 08:10
Managed to work on my project over the weekend.

And I'm happy to say the guts are about 95% ready. Just a little tweak with the controller configurations once I build the joysticks and its ready to go.

The system boots right into the frontend software I have installed and you don't see any hint of Windows at all. Even if the program crashes Windows remains hidden. I love it.

Not only can I run Mame from this software, but all my other console emulators, and other PC software. So I'm running my Dance Dance Revolution software on it as well. I can listen to music through the jukebox in the software, internet radio, watch videos off my hard drive if I wish...and the GUI is customizeable!

How neato-keen is that. The program is called GameEx. Google it...its worth using.
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Now onto other things. I know I mentioned last week that I wouldn't be blogging important stuff anymore...but I decided to say "to hell" with that...I need my venting space. And I need the friends I have in the community here to know how Im doing and whats going on with old Gatsu.

Julia and I are both in a really rough spot right now. Her medication isn't working as well as it should, so the voices and whatnot are especially loud, she's feeling suicidal, and her blood sugar is running rampant because of her hormones. So depression, sleeping all day and lack of communication are the norm right now.

She and I talked yesterday about what was going on...because for the past week we haven't really talked...she's filled me in on cutting sessions she's had for the past several weeks...just an overall picture of what was going on in her life...and its not that great.

It sucks...because alot of this stuff she can't do anything about until she gets her meds adjusted. But she knows I'm there for her if she needs me...even if its just to be around someone...we don't have to talk.

Aside from Julia...I've had alot of worry on my mind. I need more money to be able to afford to move on in the next step I wanna take in my life. I'm making $8.50 an hour right now and its just not enough. And to make things more interesting, when the other typesetter comes back from maternity leave, I'll be back to part-time status. Which cannot happen.

So I've gotta ask the boss for more money (at least $16.00/hr), stay at full-time status, or find somewhere else that will offer that and a health package.

My ultimate goal is to move to Florida and go to Full Sail for film production. But with my current salary its a un-realistic dream at the moment. But its a dream I'm not gonna let go of.

The stress of work and worrying about what was going with Julia took its tole on me this past weekend. I tried to accomplish some stuff just to keep my mind off of things...but overall I was unsuccessful. I'm feeling very tired, worn out and depressed about my overall position in life and how things are progressing. I know things in my life are no where near as bad as others...but we all have our own crosses to bear....and we all deal with things differently.

I haven't even picked up a controller for the past several days....so Im sure my clan is wondering whats up. The most I've done with my 360 the past few days was watch a movie. Thats it.

Thats it for now.

Gatsu OUT!

Comments

H2Daddy's picture
Submitted by H2Daddy on Mon, 03/26/2007 - 08:18
Hang in there. Life sucks sometimes but it gets better. The lord will not give you more than you can handle.
Gatsu's picture
Submitted by Gatsu on Mon, 03/26/2007 - 08:20
I know...what sucks though is that I've handled alot more...so I just hope he doesn't have the shovel ready.
BalekFekete's picture
Submitted by BalekFekete on Mon, 03/26/2007 - 08:33
So many trite sayings... Keep your chin up...hang in there...you'll get past it... They all boil down to the same idea - things will get better. Life is a roller coaster for everyone, it's just a matter to weather those gut-wrenching free falls that come now and then so you can enjoy the view when you get way up high and can see everything. /me actively blinks at his moment of profoundness. ;-) Like you said, you got a lot of friends here and we're all willing to listen to one degree or another. Don't be afraid to use the support you have to help out during these tough times. B.
LuxDraconis's picture
Submitted by LuxDraconis on Mon, 03/26/2007 - 08:54
All of the above. PLUS. Believe. Believe in you. No one can bring you down more then yourself. You have friends too listen, your going to make it. Later...Lux
Devonsangel's picture
Submitted by Devonsangel on Mon, 03/26/2007 - 09:03
One more voice to echo the above thoughts! Never give up, never surrender. Okay, it's not mine but it's still relevant:)
Ima_Goob's picture
Submitted by Ima_Goob on Tue, 03/27/2007 - 13:30
Obviously I don't know you much. I'm in your clan and the worst one (GOW Skills) there. I read your posts in our forum and that is all I know about you. Having read your blog I have a little more insight to "who Gatsu is". I have learned that: You are one smart son of a bitch. You also have a pile of shit on your shoulders. You seem like a pretty together guy (who I think can handle this and get through it) You have a good sense of humor (which certainly helps) Your friends here have some good advice. I sort of zeroed in on what LuxDraconis said: "Believe in you. No one can bring you down more then yourself. You have friends too listen, your going to make it." That was worth paying attention to. Oh... and you have a new friend in your corner. You have many friends here that care

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