Well sh*t on me...

A string of really annoying problems have popped over the last few days, pretty much leaving me in the same position situations like this always leave me. Broke as hell, and having to sacrifice something I want because someone else f*cks up royally.

I get home from work in the A.M. yesterday, and while I was waiting for my sleeping pill to kick in, my power goes out. Okay kinda annoying but it'll sort itself out in a bit. After 30 minutes or so, I call the power company to report an outage. It's not an outage. The power was turned off because there was a rather large chunk from last months bill that didn't get paid.

When my fiance and I moved in together, we agreed on who pays what bill because of incomes and all that. So one of her responsibilities is the power bill. It was high last month because its the hottest month of the year here in South Carolina, our air conditioning went out on us and we had to get it repaired...etc. So yeah the bill was high. I offered to help cover it because of how high it was. She said she had it covered. On several occasions she brought up how expensive the bill was. I again offered to help with it or to take over the electric bill and let her have one of the smaller monthly bills. Nope she had it. "Are you sure?" was asked at least 5 times over the period of the month. "Yup I've got it."

I went from zero to full retard in about 2 seconds. Things have already been kinda rocky between us the last few months. So this really didn't help at all. I have a bad temper, and had to keep it pushed down, because I had many many not-so-nice things to say. She gets upset when I'm mad and don't talk to her, but when I'm mad all I can think of are hateful things....so it's better that I don't talk. Most people who know me think I'm a pretty calm and collected kind of guy, and usually I am. But when my anger switch gets flipped, I'm not a nice person. My brain goes full retard and the worst things I can think of pop in there like shotgun blasts. So it's better for me to calm down and keep my trap shut until the temperature drops a few degrees and I can think straight and separate the anger from the reality. I don't want to say anything I will regret later. I regret thinking them in the first place enough as it is. I'd end up swallowing the barrel of a gun if half the sh*t I thought ever flew out of my face.

I ended up having to pay about $120 to get the power turned back on. So...that meant I had to cancel my Destiny preorder. Now...last month I could have given her the $120 to help cover it, and still have been able to get Destiny. It's the 1 game I'm actually looking forward to this year. But no...everything is cool and handled. Well sh*t on me for believing.

Oh but she can continue to buy her cigerettes and beer so she can drink and not handle her problems, but I can't have 1 game. Hmm. Mmk. And I get to be broke and can't even afford to buy a bottle of rum to at least get my drink on a little.

Nope. 

I get to handle all my sh*t sober. Lovin life right now. heh.

Yep. First World Problems. I know it's not the end of the world. It could be a billion times worse. Could live in a place with no indoor plumbing and be hunted by militaristic extremists or something. But I would at least like to enjoy some of the money I work to earn.