He11vis
Shared on Fri, 03/27/2009 - 12:35
So last night I am dropping my son off at his mom's house after my visitation and some idiot decides it would be a good idea to vandalize my precious, precious truck. I am in the driveway telling my son goodbye and I notice this truck slowing down, then I see some punk roll down the window, pull out something that looks like either an aluminum bat or shotgun barrel and then hear a loud exploding sound. Now my baby's momma doesn't live in the best 'hood so I think - drive by. I grab my kid, duck down, and then hear the truck speed off. I tell my boy to grab mommy's hand and to go inside her house. Then I run to my truck and see my driver side mirror shattered and demolished lying there on the street. That is when the high speed chase begins. I am darting in and out of the neighborhood streets, honking and flashing my lights, but the punk ass apparently went to gang bangers driving school because he is pulling in front of cars, weaving around traffic and I eventually lose him. DAMN! He had no lights on his plates so all I know is some Mexican guy in a white truck hit my mirror with a bat... doesn't make for much of a police report. Normally these gang banger punks have a dead giveaway on their vehicles but I have to get smacked by the one truck in the neighborhood that doesn't have the criminal's last name stickered on the back window in Old English lettering. I then have to suffer through the agony of driving back to baby momma's house, calling my insurance, and then picking up the broken pieces of my mirror. Next I do my best version of duct tape body repair. My perfect truck now looks like something from Sanford and Son with ugly gray duct tape wrapped around the mirror, holding the shattered parts together. Did I mention that I love my truck? It is a super awesome 2004 Ford F150 XL with custom exhaust (Magnaflows), cold air intake, stainless steel running boards, Polk speakers, etc… this was the first year of the new body style, this is a good truck. Now just because some jackass decided it would be funny to be a drive-by vandal now I have to shell out the cash to fix my baby! Not a good night for me. The only thing that brought me joy was thinking what I would do to those jerks if I caught them. I imagined pulling their fingernails out one by one, shoving a hot poker up their noses and other orifices, jamming the broken glass into their eyes, anything to remind them that it is a big 'no no' to mess with a man's truck. I guess that these hoodlums never had parents to teach them the basic rules of scoiety: don't steal, don't trash other peoples things, and every time a criminal vandalizes a car, a baby rabbit is eaten by spiders.
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Comments
Submitted by Automan21k on Fri, 03/27/2009 - 12:50
Submitted by Automan21k on Fri, 03/27/2009 - 12:51
Submitted by mrsleestak on Fri, 03/27/2009 - 13:58
Submitted by LtBlarg on Fri, 03/27/2009 - 14:05
Submitted by He11vis on Fri, 03/27/2009 - 14:21