Douchebag Executives: The Big Three

In part 2 of the new feature on my blog, we’ll take a look at arguably the biggest douchebags on the planet; General Motors Chief Executive Officer Richard Wagoner; Chrysler Chief Executive Officer Robert Nardelli; and Ford Chief Executive Officer Alan Mulally.

By Chip Somodevilla -- Getty Images

In recent days these three douchebags have been in Washington D.C. begging for a piece of the bailout money to save their floundering companies from failure.  How could this happen?  How could a once iconic symbol that is the American automobile be driven in to a proverbial brick wall?  People will be quick to blame the current economic environment, but I would like to point out the arrogance and ignorance of those at the top.

While their competitors began to shift their focus to the hybrid and alternative-fuel vehicles, those in Detroit were content to keep pumping out gas-guzzling SUVs and lower quality vehicles than those of their foreign competitors.  As late as 2006, people were still pondering that the whole hybrid movement is a fad.  On top of that, just two short months ago, Ford was making justifications for not ramping up their hybrid production.  According to Ford, we really don’t want Hybrid vehicles; we just want more fuel efficient vehicles.  While this may be true to some extent, there is only so far that the internal combustion engine can go.

Do I need to remind anyone that GM's next greatest move was to introduce a hybrid Escalade?  An Escalade...seriously?

Continuing to wallow in their arrogance and obscene opulence, the big three douchebags had the balls to fly to Washington D.C. in their PRIVATE jets to beg for a piece of the bailout.

...the chief executives of the Big Three automakers opted to fly their company jets to the capital for their hearings this week before the Senate and House -- an ill-timed display of corporate excess for a trio of executives begging for an additional $25 billion from the public trough this week.

"There's a delicious irony in seeing private luxury jets flying into Washington, D.C., and people coming off of them with tin cups in their hands," Rep. Gary L. Ackerman (D-N.Y.) advised the pampered executives at a hearing yesterday. "It's almost like seeing a guy show up at the soup kitchen in high-hat and tuxedo. . . . I mean, couldn't you all have downgraded to first class or jet-pooled or something to get here?"

From the same article, when asked if they would reduce their salary to $1 a year, only Nardelli had offered to do so.  This is not unheard of in the corporate world.  Many executives live and die by their stock price and bonuses for performance.

So it was hard to feel sorry for the executives when Rep. Peter Roskam (R-Ill.), late in the hearing, reminded them again that "the symbolism of the private jet is difficult," and mischievously asked the witnesses whether, in another symbolic gesture, they would be willing to work for $1 a year, as Nardelli has offered to do.

"I don't have a position on that today," demurred Wagoner (2007 total compensation: $15.7 million).

"I understand the intent, but I think where we are is okay," said Mulally ($21.7 million).

"I'm asking about you," Roskam pressed.

"I think I'm okay where I am," Mulally said.

And don't even think about asking him to fly commercial.

No bailouts for the foolish.