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Decisions.

jasontroyhimself

Shared on Thu, 01/25/2007 - 12:39

So I've been in the Navy for 8 years as of today and for the most part, I've enjoyed it more than disliked it.
Of course there were the days when I just wanted to get the hell out but due to my contract I never could.. and probably never would.
I've always planned on retiring.

Until recently.
I'm engaged & getting married in October to a beautiful southern woman and not only am I madly in love with her but I love her family as well.

I'm a city guy from Chicago who was adopted at a young age and have been extremely independant my whole life.
The Navy has been a perfect job for because I've been able to travel to many, many places, make a ton of friends & have my share of "different ladies in different ports".

Now that I've been with Jess for almost 4 years, I've changed over that time from loving the bachelor life to wanting to settle down and start a family.
Call it growing up.
I've gone from being single without a family to lovin' a woman who is all about family.

And so comes the decision.
One year from now, at my 9 year mark, I'm due to resign my contract & be sent to Japan or Hawaii for 3 years and over the past week we've been talking seriously about me not re-enlisting, getting out & moving to Florida to buy a house & start a family.

The Navy (actually the whole world) is a crazy place right now with the war in Iraq goin' strong. They've sent over 11,000 sailors to be ground troops,
including many close friends of mine, and my fate is not far from being one of the chosen ones to join the fight.
I didn't sign up for that & now I'm thinking that 9 years of dedicated service is honorable enough & there's no reason to put myself into
further harm if I don't have to.

The decision is here.
If I stay in, I have 12 more years until I retire in which:

-My woman will never live near her family
-My children will only see their grandparents maybe once a year
-My wife will be without me CONSTANTLY tending to pregnancies, children, bills and whatever else by herself
-I may possible lose life or limb
-I'll miss my children growing up
-We'll be finacially secure

So really... Is the finacially stability really worth it?
I went to a highschool girls basketball game the other night & I saw a couple of the fathers out there supporting their daughters &
yelling at the refs and I thought that as simple as that was, I'd miss times like that with my children.

Is it really worth the money?
I don't think so...

-jas

Comments

LB75Player's picture
Submitted by LB75Player on Fri, 01/26/2007 - 21:56
I understand what you're going through. I got out of the Navy at my 10 year mark just over 4 years ago. I agonized over the very same things you are. Ultimately I decided my family came first, and I was tired of traveling all the time and being away from them. It was the toughest decision I've ever had to make because I had also thought all along that I would do 20+ years. Good luck to you man, and thanks for serving.
jasontroyhimself's picture
Submitted by jasontroyhimself on Fri, 01/26/2007 - 22:36
Thank you very much LB. Do you ever regret your choice?
LB75Player's picture
Submitted by LB75Player on Fri, 01/26/2007 - 22:50
The only moment of regret I've had was watching the group of guys I would most likely have made chief with put on their anchors. Other than that, I haven't regretted it.
doodirock's picture
Submitted by doodirock on Thu, 01/25/2007 - 12:44
Honestly, I dont think so either. It sounds like you have a really good thing going right now. Why give all that up for a paycheck? You can always find work.
jasontroyhimself's picture
Submitted by jasontroyhimself on Thu, 01/25/2007 - 12:50
With 2old2play????? Sweeeeeeet. ; )
Gatsu's picture
Submitted by Gatsu on Thu, 01/25/2007 - 12:53
money is not everything. Its easy enough to make especially with all the things you've gotten from the Navy training. You'll get work no problem. Just dont mark travel off of your list though. If you're a specialist you end up taking alot of plane rides.
jasontroyhimself's picture
Submitted by jasontroyhimself on Sun, 02/04/2007 - 13:27
Thanks for the advice English. Seriously.. The decision stresses me out more days than not & I totally appreciate all the thoughts all of you have given me. -jas
Lbsutke's picture
Submitted by Lbsutke on Thu, 01/25/2007 - 13:14
even though money is not everything, when you do the math, the "kids" will only be like 10 or 11 when you are out (if you can have kids, read my blog's past entries, get tested to make sure you and her are working like normal. If not then this kid point is moot, if you then are thinking invetro then cash really comes into the pic). You then could be home and retired and not worrying (a lot) about cash. But losing a limb or your life is the biggest thing. You have a big decesion and it should be considered from every angle very carefully. Plus if it is job you love, that is something that is not easily found. Good luck man. :)
jasontroyhimself's picture
Submitted by jasontroyhimself on Thu, 01/25/2007 - 13:21
Thank you both for the inputs.. I can use every bit of advice availiable. It is a HUGE decision for me. =
English_C6H6's picture
Submitted by English_C6H6 on Wed, 01/31/2007 - 11:07
Hey, as a former military brat, I feel somewhat qualified to comment. Quite a few of the positions in the military (other than Army grunt or killer jarhead) have skills that are useful in the private market and are often better compensated than in the military. The military offers job security, good benefits (used to be outstanding benefits and may still be going down), perqs not available in private sector (Base housing, BX/PX, etc.), and comraderie/ sense of doing what's right. Add these things up and see if they are worth it to you. I know people who could have made 3-4X what they madce in the military (my dad), but would not have been happy because of the military "environment." It took a trip to Iraq and a GSW for my dad to start re-evaluating his choice. My basic advice is: would you be happy NOT being in the military? If you spend more time with family, but are misirable, it's not worth it. If you're just as happy to be out of uniform as you are to be in uniform, ditch the USN and go civilian. Good luck.
OldManRiver48's picture
Submitted by OldManRiver48 on Fri, 01/26/2007 - 01:43
Men make descisions from logic, women by emotion. Take the best ideas from each and see what fits. To many...Family is everything, to me......why else are we here?

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