Style Notes

Kwazy

Shared on Thu, 08/09/2007 - 15:15
The Faux-hawk. This is without a doubt the most inane male hair style in the history of human culture. Seriously. If an ancient Sumerian had tried to pull this look off, he would have taken the business end of a spear to the face. I do not know from whence it first spawned, but the style has been perpetuated by a seemingly endless parade of pseudo alt/punk/skater bands of late (all of which to me sound like they’re trying to ape Blink 182…who coincidentally succeeded solely by aping early Green Day). I’m guessing the faux-hawk sporting fop thinks his hair says to others, “I’m slightly dangerous in a nonconforming way…just like the other two dozen twenty-somethings in the bar.” What it really says is “I’m a total douche bag poser, and I fully understand that if ever got a real Mohawk, Daddy would kick the living shit out of me and stop paying for community college.
 
Cargo Pants/Shorts.  I will wear these things the rest of my life…I don’t care if the go out of style (are the still in?) or not. The shorts I’m wearing right now have seven pockets. Seven pockets! My phone has been ringing for a half hour. I know it’s somewhere in my pants, but I can’t find it….and I couldn’t be happier. I am also carrying somewhere between my belt and Tevas my keys, my money clip, my Moleskine, a pen, my iPod, and a silver dollar from the Paris casino. Prior to cargo pants, I had to employ a Sherpa from Katmandu named Ookahk to haul all this crap around. The sole problem lies in washing said pants. Just as I can’t seem to find the one item I need at a given moment, neither can I manage to get the pockets entirely empty. Usually it is the pen which gets left behind and sent through the laundry. This causes ugly blue stains on the cargo pants, which then necessitates the purchase of more pants…thus the cycle of life continues. Cleaning the Sherpa was much easier as I just stripped him down and hosed him off in the backyard. All in all, though, I still prefer the pants.

Comments

Kysr_Gal's picture
Submitted by Kysr_Gal on Thu, 08/09/2007 - 18:47
I love those pants - I have a pair and think they're definitely still in style. They're not as big and bulky as the parachute pants in the 80's.
doorgunnerjgs's picture
Submitted by doorgunnerjgs on Thu, 08/09/2007 - 15:20
Maybe you should number the pockets and check them in sequence before washing them! But, yes, they are great. I need to get some more 'cause the last ones shrunk down to nothing (or did I really gain that much weight?).
Aonon's picture
Submitted by Aonon on Thu, 08/09/2007 - 15:21
Faux hawks are cool if you are in a Pee-wee hockey league. I am not with you on the Cargo pants/shorts though....
H2Daddy's picture
Submitted by H2Daddy on Thu, 08/09/2007 - 15:29
Love the pants.
kade47's picture
Submitted by kade47 on Thu, 08/09/2007 - 15:50
"Cleaning the Sherpa was much easier as I just stripped him down and hosed him off in the backyard." And that's why I hate it when you don't blog. Too funny.

Join our Universe

Connect with 2o2p