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MikeTheKnife

Today is my girlfriend's birthday, so I have to stop and get her flowers on the way home. What is the deal with flowers? I kind of view buying flowers in the same light as doing maintenance on my car. It's expensive, and I really don't have any desire at all to do it, but I know I'm screwed if I don't. Water pump goes out? Better drop that cash. Valentine's Day? Better buy flowers to prevent a major problem. I don't appreciate flowers in the same way she does, even though she seems to think I should. The last time I sent some, I bought them online and had them sent to her work. To her credit, the first thing she said was 'Thank you'. But to her downfall the second thing she said was 'You bought these online didn't you?' in a kind of disappointed voice. I said yes, why do you ask? She said 'Oh, I just thought you might like to go to the store and look around.' Nope, sorry. You want flowers you get em but don't expect me to enjoy a nice afternoon out at the boutique. I guess it's just another case of 'if you do something for me that makes you miserable, it means you love me'. Which is a bit screwed up.

Anyway, I'll buy the flowers because I know they'll make her happy. And then in three weeks she'll be clamoring about how I never buy her flowers except on her birthday, which is awesome. I can't wait!

Comments (13)

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DragonsFairy83·
I don't really like flowers and never expect my boyfriend to buy them for me. If he does buy them I accept them because it's a nice gesture on his part. To me flowers are a waste of money because they die so soon after you buy them.
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MikeTheKnife·
I know I deliberately tried not to generalize all people in my blog because I know some chicks don't like flowers and some dudes do.
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KingDrewsky·
Go ahead and send some to her on the day after her birthday too, just to put a little extra zing on it.
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MikeTheKnife·
That is some good thinking King. That would definitely be a surprise.
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dos·
It's the thought that counts - if you've seen Fever Catch, the part where Fallon's character sends Drew's character the dozen roses...and their stems with Pete Rose faces...that's pretty damn funny. So, get creative. What does she like that you can put a dozen of in a vase or basket?
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English_C6H6·
Send flowers too often and you'll look guilty. Luckly, my wife subscribes to the \"Waste of money cause they'll die\" school. I got much more marital currency when I bought a bunch of hydrangias and planted them in the front yard.
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MikeTheKnife·
I have found that it's a bad idea to respond to 'Why don't you send me flowers' to 'why don't you buy me video games'. In my book that's exactly the same thing. You buy an item that you don't care about, because you love the person and you know they'll like it. But apparently only guys are required to do that.
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rabbmasterflash·
it buys you oral, which marriage then cancels out
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YEM·
@ english how do you have a subscription to a school???
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YEM·
BTW -1 for getting rid of miguel el cucillo
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ekattan·
Oh! I told my wife I rather buy her and expensive gift that a piece of vegetation that will die in three days. Flowers are expensive as hell and last only for days. I can think of a thousand better choices for a gift than flowers. \r \r Take a page from Homer Simpson. He gets Marge a gift he knows she won't want so she will end up giving it to him.
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UnwashedMass·
I completely fuck up on the gift so that when I give a semi-decent one that requires forethought, I get double credit for working half ass.\r \r Or I try and rent a dog-riding monkey to deliver the wilted three day old bouquet. He's a monkey, not a delivery driver, give him a break!
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FatBastard·
dumbass, you buy flowers at a flower shop, you buy ladies clothing at a boutique!! Why I know this Ill never tell!