Defecation in Public

For those of you not following the Goodnight Thread I offer this cautionary tale:

 I was living in some apartments, in Las Vegas, near the corner of Tropicana and Maryland Parkway in the winter of 1991,and liked to hang out at a bar called "The Inn Zone." Some famous football player owned it but I can't remember which one. One Friday night they had a pajama party with a contest and all that shit....again, can't remember the details. What I do remember is that the bartender who was working Friday night came back to work around 2 am Sunday morning and I was still there in my pajamas and was abruptly asked to leave. Walking from the bar to my apartment (my wife had driven home in the car at some point) was actually the most exercise I had gotten all weekend and I hadn't made it 50 feet down the alley when I had to go...real bad. It wasn't a real problem as I had several cocktail napkins in my pj pockets, but failed to see the police car waiting for me...I may have caused a bit of a ruckus while I was leaving. They shined the spotlight on my most recent weight loss and I could see the steam rising off of it in the light, which compromised my deniability. I agreed to pay for the damage to the bar and was forced to serve a community service stint at McCarran Airport in restitution for my little parting gift in the alley.