SarcasmoJones
Shared on Tue, 07/16/2013 - 23:02I've taken a hard left turn this week for some reason. I don't know why, I tend to avoid introspective analysis, not because I'm afraid of what I'll find, I'm just too fucking lazy to make that kind of commitment. I may have derailed a couple of threads this week, but I assure you that it was not out of malice...I did it to amuse myself. I also sent an e-mail to a co-worker this week that resulted in disciplinary action: it was also crafted to be simultaneously incendiary to the recipient and amusing for me. However, whatever it was that was motivating me to go left seems to have dissipated: I think my muse may have been sick or something. Whatever. I'll likely be returning to my usual state of indifferent semi-participation in the forums, so if you're seeking verbal or written retribution against the Mighty Sarcasmo Jones, be sure and post in in the comments of one of my reviews or feel free to troll my blog. I enjoy attention, even when it's negative....especially when it's negative: that's usually when I do my best writing. If I've hurt your feelings or pissed you off this week, then I apologize. I'm a condescending dickhead, but we already knew that, didn't we? I don't call myself Sarcasmo for nothing.
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Comments
Submitted by VengefulJedi on Tue, 07/16/2013 - 23:27
Left turns are sometimes necessary - if for no other reason than to get it out of our system, so it's not festering into something epically fucked up. Glad you're settling back to normal, man.
Submitted by Oldschool 2o4f on Wed, 07/17/2013 - 10:39
Jeez, that's some sappy crap coming from you Jones.
However, the e-mail might get you morer than just entertainment. Those are a tad more dangerous...
I know, I go to "training" at least three times a year...
Submitted by SarcasmoJones on Thu, 07/18/2013 - 09:34
It's not necessarily sappy, I just lost my head of steam, which in turn blew my motivation to constantly be a dick to people I don't know. I think that it was Parcells that killed it, he had mentioned something about feeling like a baby seal, so I was going to drop a YouTube vid of baby seals getting clubbed in response...but the video bummed me out. I've posted some crazy shit but there's no way I'm posting something that fucking horrific. It hurt my soul to see that. Anyway, I went ahead and included the e-mail that got me into trouble at work...have fun with it.
Good Morning, Bruce
I see several problems with this order you are trying to force through the system here at Company X, and subsequently, our logistics guy. The first issue is your misinterpretation of the service levels: a 2nd day shipment will arrive on Monday, not Friday. When shipping a pole on Thursday to deliver on Friday one would specify next day delivery, not 2nd day. The second issue is that the pole has not been made yet. While optimism has its advantages, the by-product of optimism is often disappointment. If we don’t have it, we can’t ship it. My third issue is a lesson in e-mail etiquette: when you type in all caps it indicates that you are screaming at a person. I saw the e-mail you sent to Amy yesterday, and I do not appreciate you screaming at her, or any other Company X employee. I intentionally placed the etiquette lesson before this last point, so you would know, without any doubt, that I am screaming at you. YOU DO NOT WORK IN THE COMPANY X SHIPPING DEPARTMENT AND HAVE NO BUSINESS PLACING SHIPPING REQUESTS FOR COMPANY X, ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU OBVIOUSLY DO NOT COMPREHEND SERVICE LEVELS OR THE FACT THAT WE CAN’T SHIP WHAT WE DON’T HAVE!!!
I realize that you’re hoping to shave some shipping expenses by relegating this order to 2nd day status, but your manic behavior indicates that a Friday delivery is an imperative. Do we need to alter the service level to next day? Please advise.
Any additional involvement on your part is not required.
Thank You
RW
Submitted by Lbsutke on Wed, 07/17/2013 - 11:26
Fuck'em let them all burn.....
Submitted by CrypticCat on Wed, 07/17/2013 - 14:42
Man, what are you worried about? It was great fun and I enjoyed it. It's kinda weird to see that you're A) writing up an apology to a bunch of humorless geezers that have no other goal in life than to beat down anyone who shows a hint at a smile and B) that you're self-concious about what that those same motherfuckers think of you.
I just wish the admins would take me up on my request and delete my account from this wretched place. I came to realise that at 50 years old, I'm still too young for 2old2play.
Get some sense into you before a website dictates your self-image.
Submitted by SarcasmoJones on Wed, 07/17/2013 - 16:34
If you only knew how many times I have to apologize for shit I said during the course of a week. I go left all the fucking time, I just try not to do it in the forums...I kind of work here. That being said, I do have a low tolerance for bullshit and I love making people look stupid, especially on Twitter. I don't want to Twitterize my 2old2play experience, even if everyone else here turned out to be complete dicks. I will continue to step in and set someone straight if I think they need it, and apologize when I need to, but I'm not going to derail every thread I participate in just for fun. I hope that makes sense, amigo.
Submitted by NorthernPlato on Wed, 07/17/2013 - 18:31
it's a left-turn week: on Monday I overheard a coworker talking about a local brewery to another coworker. The name of the drink was "valley girl"; I couldn't pass it up, so I IM'd one of the coworkers with the following: 'I hope the tagline is 'goes down easy'.
Fortunately, I knew the coworker would find it funny and the IMs aren't kept around like emails are.