Dear Doodi

I am having trouble clearing my schedule to make a timely appearance at this Friday’s community hoopla. I’ll definitely be on. It just doesn’t look good for me joining the fray promptly at the early hour of 7 pm cst.

 

Normally it wouldn’t be a big deal. I’d simply bribe Mrs. Snuphy with the promise of labor, sex, or food, and she’d do Snuphette duty without me. Unfortunately, our eldest Snuphette has a terminal affliction called “ballet”, and has a performance Friday night. Mrs. Snuphy will be back stage at the gig until a yet to be determined hour. That leaves me with the two youngest Snuphettes to put to bed before I can play.

 

So if you could show up at my place around 6:30 cst, that would be great. My kids won’t be any trouble at all, and will likely go straight to bed for you around 7:30. Just keep in mind that the 5 year old likes to go number 2 just before bed, and needs help with the clean up. And the two year old has picked up one of Mommy’s new pet names for Daddy. So if she looks at you with most adorable of faces and calls you a worthless, dickless, cocksucker, please don’t take it personally. You eventually get used to it. I know I have!

 

Almost forgot. My in laws are supposed to be in town for the show. So it would probably be best if you showed up shit faced wearing either a loin cloth or a thong (see 2 blogs down) with obscenities lipsticked on your chest and thighs.

 

So, thanks in advance!! There will be plenty of Natty Lights in the fridge for afterwards!!

 

Your friend,

 

Snuphy.