# 1 Reason I Married Him

I think my husband is hilarious...

At his work the Senior Vice President of Human Resources sent this email to the entire company:

Good Morning,

Many of you rely on the ice machine several times a day. It's obvious that it has not been working well for some time -- not producing ice consistently and leaking badly. We have had the machine repaired multiple times. I am very disappointed to say that recently we have received many reports of employees shaking and hitting the machine. This knocks parts and tubes loose and contributes to additional leaking and failure to produce ice. A new ice machine has been under consideration, but frankly, I'm not sure we will order one considering the reports of abuse we are receiving.
 

In response, Dean went to the store and bought some ice and sent this email to his department (and the HR woman). He's been working there for 17 years. He tends to get away with a few things.

Seeing as all my calls to FEMA have gone unanswered (big surprise!), I have taken it upon myself to step-up in this time of crisis to help alleviate human suffering.  Now, I'm not calling myself a hero, but.....

I have managed to procure a limited supply of ice - 5 lbs. of sweet, delicious ice.  I have stored this ice in the freezer of the 2nd floor refrigerator.  Now, I'm sure your first instinct is to rush the freezer, take as much ice as possible, and horde it.  Please, recognize the fact that every human has an inalienable right to ice (or at least the ones in our department), and conduct yourself in a socially responsible manner.
This ice has to sustain all of our needs for an indefinite period.  I do not want to be forced to impose an ice rationing policy, but I am prepared to do so.

If you do not find the ice in the freezer, DO NOT HIT THE REFRIGERATOR!
This will only exacerbate our already perilous situation.

Further, I have heard rumors of a method for creating ice by cooling water to a certain temperature.  I will research this method further, but the technology involved in such a process may be prohibitive.

Do not give up!

Dean Dragert
Senior Business Analyst & Hero