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zombiekitten

Shared on Tue, 03/22/2011 - 09:27

It's been well over a month since the second round of chemo. I was told, by the doctors at the chemo center and my own doctor, that 2-4 weeks after the second round, we would know, for sure, if it worked. Well, i feel like shit. I'm in pain, all the time. I'm exhausted, all the time, for no reason other than the disease. i was 'allowed' to add Prednisone to the medication line up, but only temporarily and only 5mg a day. With that, i'm doing a bit better, but not a lot better. i'm still in pain and still tired all the time, but i can actually do one thing a day ie laundry, or vacuum, or go to the doctor/lab/pharmacy. But that's it...i can literally only do one thing a day, then i'm freakin exhausted and have to rest until the next day. Which means that the chemo did NOT work right?

Went to the doctor today. Explained the above ie not doing much better, even with 5mg of Prednisone helping out. i said 'so we know the chemo didn't work...' and he said 'oh no, we don't know that for sure. If you're not better in six months, we'll try two more rounds of chemo.' The Foundation money i got to help pay for the chemo is gone. it was $2800. and my out of pocket expenses for the chemo would have been exactly that. i can't apply for the money again for a year. So i'll have to put $2800. on my credit cards in six month. And the chemo made me so sick for a month and a half, all i could do was lay on the couch. And if it didn't work the first time, what makes him think it will work a second time?? None of the doctors said anything about trying it a second time. They ALL said if it's going to work, it will be in that first month after round two. WTF???

AND my blood pressure has always been scary low. You know on tv shows and in the movies, when someone's about to die and the nurse shouts out a super low bp? Yeah. That's always been NORMAL for me. On a day when my bp was high, it would be 120/80. For me, that was high. Well since this chemo, it's been scary high. Today it was 155/120. My doctor claims there's no way the chemo could have caused this...but i'm finding it hard to believe for 40 yrs i had super LOW bp, and now, after chemo, it's always high?? Again, i say WTF??

i'm sure getting angry, frustrated, and breaking things is not good for high bp, but i am angry, frustrated, and i REALLY want to break something.

*Bitch rant over*

Comments

Vix_Sundown's picture
Submitted by Vix_Sundown on Wed, 03/23/2011 - 18:27
Rant away! Sometimes that's all you can do. I don't know much about chemo. But I do know that sometimes doctors can drive you crazy. They can tell you contradictory stuff sometimes, maybe because they don't really know the answer or because they're afraid to commit to an answer in case they are wrong. All I know is it's annoying. Good luck! Hang in there :)
TANK's picture
Submitted by TANK on Tue, 03/22/2011 - 10:21
Chemo is toxic, that's the point of it, you're poisoning yourself under doctor supervision. Don't be so hard on yourself not having any energy. My wife was a real trooper when she went through it, she even kept working. Granted she sits in a chair all day, it's not physical work she does but still she got up every day and went to work when she much rather would have liked tos tay in bed all day. Which is pretty much all she did while not at work, laid in bed or on the couch resting. I'd make us dinner and do chores around the house so she could rest. I think what you're feeling is normal/typical though. She had a cocktail of three different chemos each time she had a session, i think she had 6 sessions, one a month. She was on a ton of meds, one for nausea, one to boost her red blood cell count, one to boost her white blood cells (i think those two were actually injections) and a few more that I can't remember now. We're past the 7 year mark for remission which means she's no more at risk now than a person who's not had cancer yet. Anyway rest as much as you need and don't be too hard on yourself if you jst need to rest for the day. Take care of yourself and don't worry so much about house work and all that, it's really not important right now.
AngryJason's picture
Submitted by AngryJason on Tue, 03/22/2011 - 14:30
Hang in there. I hope it turns the corner for you.

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