Terrorist Cookies!!

Big0ne

Shared on Thu, 12/14/2006 - 13:31

So a few moments ago a semi-attractive lady walks in the door at my business.  I didn't recognize her as one of our regular customers so I immediately became suspicious.  We posted an "Absolutely No Soliciting" sign on the front door a few years back, but apparently I mistakenly assumed that door to door sales people could read.  Nonetheless I greeted her as politely as I could since she didn't seem to want to go away on her own.  Just as I had assumed, she was "introducing herself to the businesses in this area".   However, this sales lady was different.  She had cookies!  Better yet, she had no interest in talking to me about how many employees we had, what type of work we did or any of the other usual b.s. topics designed to waste my time. Just, here's my card, here's some cookies and happy holidays.  SWEET! 

Off she went, into the trash went her card and into the kitchen went the cookies.  The cookies appeared to be a mix of store bought and possibly home made treats.  They were simply placed on a plastic plate and wrapped over with Saran Wrap.  I tried a couple.  They were pretty decent.  Then it hit me.  I don't know that lady.  These cookies could be laced with any number of toxins.  After all a business card can be printed off on a standard color printer for next to nothing.  In fact now that I think of it, I don't remember seeing a car in the driveway or for that matter an actual street address on her business card.  Yet, for some reason if a complete stranger hands me a plate of cookies, I'll scarf 'em down without a second thought.

Which brings me to the title of this blog.  Maybe the next terrorist threat will come from cookies.  I mean who doesn't love a good cookie?  As I've so clearly demonstrated, all you would need is a freindly face, a cheapo business card and a plate.  I assume I'm not alone in my exuberance to eat a fresh plate of cookies.  So the next time you take one of those gems off the plate at work, a Christmas party or public counter, stop and think.  Could this be a WMD?

Comments

tait's picture
Submitted by tait on Thu, 12/14/2006 - 13:37
But, what kind of self control would it take to just toss your cookies?
twistedcaboose's picture
Submitted by twistedcaboose on Thu, 12/14/2006 - 13:43
Dork. lol :)
Robbway's picture
Submitted by Robbway on Thu, 12/14/2006 - 13:45
I'd imagine that more devastation could be had with potato chips, french fries, and nachos.
MikeTheKnife's picture
Submitted by MikeTheKnife on Thu, 12/14/2006 - 14:00
If she was only semi-attractive, then beware. But if she was super-hot then it'd be OK, super-hot chicks would never poison you.
Lbsutke's picture
Submitted by Lbsutke on Thu, 12/14/2006 - 15:30
I have to say, your theory is a flimsy as you Indy defense against my Jags running attack!! Suck it!! ;)
Anonymous's picture
Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on Thu, 12/14/2006 - 16:12
Cookies are second to beer(especially domestic brands) for poisoning the masses.
webmonkee's picture
Submitted by webmonkee on Thu, 12/14/2006 - 17:55
See, the tip-off for me would be saran wrap. Terrorists always use high quality stuff, right? No "Bob's Plastic Wrap" for WMD cookies, ya know?

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