Interesting: my Daughter's bum just assploded

Yep, the things they don't tell you when you have a baby. 

#1: when little babies sleep they make a ton of noise.  It's amazing they get any rest at all.

#2 when little babies poop they make a ton of noise. No really, like it's a bit frightening. Grunting, groaning, red faces: the whole 9 yards. If I made those noises while on the can my husband would call 911.  Supposedly when they are really little they don't know how to poop, so they push, but at the same time tighten everything up. Now that is something to bring up when they are older. "Now listen here little Missy: I was there when you couldn't figure out how to crap, so don't give me that attitude!"

And lastly:  when you start solid foods babies may stop pooping: for DAYS.  My wee girl eats at least 6 times a day, and she stopped pooping for 4 days.  That's a lot of food just kicking around in one very tiny digestive tract. Then BAM!  It has the consistency of slightly watery maple syrup and it zipped all the way up her back: sticky grossness.

Needless to say, I just gave her a bath.  Anything else you wish people had told you about kids?