Parents Relationships...

rockcrawler69

Shared on Thu, 08/16/2007 - 15:38
The source root of the problem is not the games or movies but the parents. I truly believe that.

Columbia University commissioned a study  after columbine to find out how family structure between a single parent family headed by the mother and a two parent biological family headed by a  Father and Mother and how it effected a child's involvement in drugs and alcohol and how it extrapolated to violence. When they released the study, this is what it showed:

A) A child raised in single parent home where the mother is the head, is 30% more likely to be involved in drugs, alcohol and violence. [i](thats a pretty high percentage)[/i]

B) A child raised in a 2 parent family BUT there is a fair to POOR relationship with the father,  is 68% more likely. (HOLY COW, THAT IS OVER TWICE  AS LIKELY as the above)

C) A child raised in a a 2 parent family BUT there is a GOOD to EXCELLENT relationship with the father,  It is stated, by Columbia in the negative because of the way the norm was established in the study... that child is 94% LESS LIKELY  to ever be involved in drugs alcohol and violence.  In other words it is possible, but not probable.

It is not just the structure of the family but the relationship within that structure  and that relationship is THE responsibility of the parents.

The FBI , after Columbine, spent millions on developing a profile to help teachers, administrators and school police help identify potential shooters. After several years and studying 17 shooters  they found THREE main ingredients to the profile.

1) They are all white. Not Hispanic or Black or minority. White

2) They are middle class

3) The father is either absent or distant in the parenting process.

It is up to us as parents to teach and love and nurture our children. I think the biggest problem facing this country today is the lack of the Daddy. Mothers, you guys are taken for granted, you will always be their to love, to help to hold you children, it is just a given. It is when a FATHER does it that it is out of the norm.


I will go one more.... Johns Hopkins Medical School did a 30 years study.. 30 YEARS. They wanted to see if their was a single predicting factor, and single link , if they could look at a young person's life and say if this is true then they have a greater potential, not a guarantee just a greater potential for 5 things.
1) Mental Illness
2) Hypertension
3) Malignant Tumor
4) Coronary Heart Disease
5) Suicide

Could they look at a young at a young person and see a single thing and say they are more likely to have the above. 30 years, 1377 graduates of Johns Hopkins, the study by Dr. Thomas Andwasinsky.

After 30 years they found the most significant predictor was the Lack of Closeness to ones Parents
I though Come On.... but then I read and understood why within 3 minutes and it made sense. It is something that all of us have everyday and we all handle it differently, sometimes good sometime bad.

STRESS

They found that a child raised in a loving and intimate  environment as they grow up can handle stress SO MUCH BETTER in their life.

We should quite looking to blame outside issues. Quite looking to blame the games, movies etc. Of coarse they are not healthy for all kids and ages and should be monitored and restricted according to age and maturity. THAT IS WHAT PARENTS SHOULD DO for petes sake.

Comments

CapnHun's picture
Submitted by CapnHun on Thu, 08/16/2007 - 15:44
Good observations Rock.
tarbs's picture
Submitted by tarbs on Thu, 08/16/2007 - 16:00
this brings to mind a saying i have always liked and tried to keep in the front of my mind. "Any dick can be a father. It takes a man to be Daddy."
MikeTheKnife's picture
Submitted by MikeTheKnife on Thu, 08/16/2007 - 16:03
When I see a study like this, I always seem to want more information. The scientist in me wants to ask if, instead of factor a (parental relationship) causing factor b (behavioral problems), perhaps both factor a and factor b are the result of another factor, c which was not part of the test. What makes me wonder is that my brother and I were raised in the exact same environment, but we turned out very differently. So maybe there is a factor C. I am of course not implying that parental involvement doesn't have a huge impact on behavior, I just have a tendency to overanalyze scientific data.
TDrag27's picture
Submitted by TDrag27 on Thu, 08/16/2007 - 16:08
@ Mike "I just have a tendency to overanalyze scientific data" As you should...and everyone else. Most people are statistically illiterate.
MTK005's picture
Submitted by MTK005 on Thu, 08/16/2007 - 16:15
nice blog rock, I agree - I come from a single parent household, but the reason i am not way it there is that I have a wonderful relationship with my father - i hope i can be half the Dad he is.
rockcrawler69's picture
Submitted by rockcrawler69 on Thu, 08/16/2007 - 16:21
Mike, I would have to say that nothing is 100% and at no time did I say nor the data say it was definite. Sometimes, no matter what you do, a child turns out "bad" But I will go with being a good Dad.
MikeTheKnife's picture
Submitted by MikeTheKnife on Thu, 08/16/2007 - 17:06
I agree Rock, I sure wasn't disputing the study. It's very possible they did account for other factors that just didn't come out in the description of the studies. I'm just a curious character :)
itsbillykiller's picture
Submitted by itsbillykiller on Thu, 08/16/2007 - 17:27
My wife read the same study and reminds me of this when I yell at my kids. I grew up in a home with a tough ex-military father who is one of four children born to Romianian parents. I am trying to not be my father. If I had a better relationship with him I might have been a brain surgeon.......instead of making bongs for friends in school. Atleast I had fun! :)
Big0ne's picture
Submitted by Big0ne on Thu, 08/16/2007 - 18:08
Nice Rock.

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