shame..

on me for not blogging last week. Busy with work and of course the CODz... Then Friday morning rolled around and it was sunny, calm winds and like 40 degrees out (which is damn nice weather around here this time of year), so we headed out to the Logan range and spent the day blowing shit up. Hence no Chicks with Guns last week. I'll make up for it at some point....

So I was reading some crap about how Heckler and Koch may start marketing the 416 etc to civilians, perhaps only in Germany at first but there could be some truth to the rumor they are getting ready to break ground on a factory right here in the US. Sucks for those guys who were stupid enough to pay $3k for their super ninja extra lethal 416 upper lol. In case you couldn't tell, I'm no HK fanboy, in fact I'm exactly the opposite. I fucking hate their hollywood marketing BS.. not to mention all the secret squirrel proof marks they put on everything just to give the collectors a boner. As if all those esoteric runes of power somehow make their guns more lethal ;) Don't get me wrong, HK has made some nice weapons. The HK P7 is an incredible pistol design and I carried one for years. Of course they no longer produce that model. We used to have 2 select fire MP5s (post dealer samples) as range rental guns at the dealership/indoor range where I used to work. Luckily I wasn't the certified HK armorer, so I didn't have to make them work again every time they broke. But damn they were fun when they were running, of course getting spare parts to keep them that way was a nightmare because HK didn't give 2 shits about us as "civilian" customers all the way over in bumfuck USA, but that is another story altogether..


Anyway, here is an infamous example of HKs genius marketing dpt. that apparently has most 20 year old mall ninja airsoft commandos convinced that there is no compromise. Sexy ad copy? Yes. Bullets in magazine backwards? Yep. LOL cracks me up everytime I see it.

Wish I still had a hard copy of this brochure, they are probably collector items now..



Yeah, so all this reminded me of an awesome post by Correia:

"In a world of compromises, some people put the bullets in the magazine backwards...

But it doesn't matter, because our gun is on the cover of the Rainbow Six video games. Look how cool that SEAL coming out of the water looks... If you buy a $2,000 SOCOM, you will be that cool of an operator too. And chicks will dig you.

At HK, we stuck a piston on an AR15, just like a bunch of other companies have done, dating back to about 1969. However ours is better, because we refuse to sell it to civillians. Because you suck, and we hate you.

Our XM8 is the greatest rifle ever developed. It may melt, and it doesn't fit any accesories known to man, but that is your fault. If you were a real operator, you would love it. Once again, look at Rainbow Six, that G36 sure is cool isn't it? Yeah, you know you want one.

And by the way, check out our new HK45. We decided that humans don't need to release the magazine with their thumbs. If you were a really manly teutonic operator, you would be able to reach the controls. Plus we've fired 100,000,000 rounds through one with zero malfunctions, and that was while it was buried in a lake of molten lava, on the moon. If you don't believe us, it is because you aren't a real operator.

By the way, our cheap, mass-produced, stamped sheet metal guns like the G3 and MP5 are the bestest things ever, and totally worth asinine scalpers prices, but note that cheap, mass-produced, stamped sheet metal guns from other countries are commie garbage. Not that it matters, because you're civillians, so we won't sell them to you anyway. Because you suck, and we hate you, but we know you'll be back. We can beat you down like a trailer park wife, but you'll come back, you always do.

Buy our stuff.

Sincerely

HK Marketing Department"

:D