Saturday morning ricochet

I have this way of thinking I call "ricochet", which is just a bouncing around of thoughts where one thought causes your mind to ricochet to another, seemingly unrelated thought.  That's what I was doing at the gym this morning.  Wow, I sorta got a headache from all that bouncing around!

It started with my thinking about being Catholic.  No, better yet, a fallen Catholic.  Actually, I'm closer to being agnostic.  But I went to parochial (Catholic) school, attended mass every day!  And so on.  According to the Catholic religion, I have never been married, cuz I have not received the sacrament of marriage by a priest.  Well!  That means I have lived in sin with 2 men, 1st and 2nd "husband".  Now, the ricochet.....If I have lived in sin with 2 men, and done, um, various other wicked things, will I burn in hell?  Or just go to purgatory for eternity?  Bounce...

That got me to thinking about death.  What is it like to die?  I know, everyone's experience is different and unique, but some are painful, some are expected, some not, whatever.  I have thought about how I would like to die, and it would be quietly and in my sleep.  Drug induced?  Maybe, if the time was right.  Which got me to thinking, who would miss me when I'm gone?  I grieved my dad for a loooong time, and still have problems with August, the anniversary of his death.  My mother?  She had a long illness, so any grieving was long done by the time she finally died.  I think my daughter and grandkids would miss me, for about a day or two.  Maybe a week.  Bounce...

This was a huge ricochet.  My friend got a call from her new luv from Afghanistan at work yesterday.  Talk about missing someone when they're gone!  She started to cry and wouldn't get off the phone, so I knew who she was talking to.  When she hung up, she said she needed a hug.  She cried into my shoulder for quite a while.  I know this cuz she was sobbing and my neck was getting kinda soggy.  I envy her, and I don't.  But, a new love is always passionate, if nothing else.  This one will cause her more grief than anything, but......

Well, I had more ricochets, but, this is enuf of letting you into my head today.