COULOW
Shared on Tue, 01/26/2010 - 12:33I love college. I love Textiles. I love Sociology. There is a trip to New York City for a Fashion Convention and another in Las Vegas, called Magic. I can NOT afford all of these! However, the Gods smiled down, and there IS a road trip to LA in March. THAT, is swingable. So, LA, here I come with my crew of 15 women and 4 gay guys. Yes, I am sorry, but I swear that there are NO straight men in Fashion. Or at least in my cramped class of Design and Merchandising students.
I don't know why, probably my demenor, however the Professors on first sight are asking what year in Design I'm in. Really. Do I look like a Designer or are they trying to put it nicely that I dress like a weirdo? Merchandising baby! Merchandising, merchandising, merchandising. May the Schwartz be wit chu!....
A joke, since I'm all hyped up on Caramel Coffee and I have to hide from my boss to read my sociology book.
PS. Borderlands. Siren. Easiest character EVER!
THE MIRACLE OF TOILET PAPER
Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror complaining to my
husband that my breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically
telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion.
'If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet
paper and rub it between them for a few seconds.' Willing to try
anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in front of the
mirror, rubbing it between my breasts. 'How long will this take?' I asked.
They will grow larger over a period of years,' my husband replies. I
stopped. 'Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my
breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?' Without
missing a beat he says, 'Worked for your butt, didn't it?'
He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy, he may even walk
again, although he will probably continue to take his meals through a straw.
Stupid, stupid man.
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Comments
Submitted by MikeTheKnife on Tue, 01/26/2010 - 14:48
Submitted by COULOW on Tue, 01/26/2010 - 15:54
Submitted by J-Cat on Tue, 01/26/2010 - 16:03
Submitted by COULOW on Wed, 01/27/2010 - 09:30