FreeRadikal
Shared on Wed, 02/27/2013 - 08:57Sometimes you feel like a nut…other times you realize that you were a jerk. I was kind of a boob last night, it was clan night and we went into customs and we had a non-clan member in the room who was a friend of another clan person. We have a strict policy to only allow clan members in on custom game nights, so I booted him. I merely announced it was clan night and brought down the hammer. I feel I should have been more polite. That said, my thoughts are these, if I were to apologize to that guy who is that meant to serve? I think it serves me best, so I’ve decided to let it go and to be more polite in the future. If I send him a message and say sorry I was an asshole, I just make myself feel better and it really does nothing for that guy does it? I don’t like being an ass and I even like it less when someone is an ass to me.
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Comments
Submitted by Az on Wed, 02/27/2013 - 09:35
It does serve you for sure, but if you were on the receiving end, would you feel better if someone apologized to you for their behaviour? I think it would be a win/win :)
Submitted by Vix_Sundown on Wed, 02/27/2013 - 12:26
I hear ya on the apology. Lots of times apologies can be completely self-serving, where an actual change in behavior would be more meaningful. It's a tough call.
In a way more serious situation than a simple clan night snafu, I've had a person apologize to me for a long-time hurt, not because they truly felt the pain of what they done to me, but only to absolve themselves of all responsibility. Then if I still felt hurt or upset, then that's my fault because they had already apologized. This isn't a meaningful apology. It's just a guilt-dump.
Submitted by Az on Wed, 02/27/2013 - 12:56
ah :)
Submitted by FreeRadikal on Wed, 02/27/2013 - 14:28
I sent an apology over the xbox live because I feel I should after this comment. I'm sure it probably doesn't mean much to some but if I feel I have wronged someone I always try and make amends...usually through actions but in this case, I don't think I have that option...without coming across as creepy.
Submitted by zombiekitten on Wed, 02/27/2013 - 14:42
People need to police their friends on our clan nights. Let them know its "policy" to have clannies only, so the party lead doesn't have to boot them. You, sir, are one of the nicest people on Xbox or this site. You're NOT an ass!!
Submitted by Az on Wed, 02/27/2013 - 14:59
Oh I didn't mean it in a bad way. I just meant that it made more sense after you clarified. Although I do not play consoles (and have never been in a clan), I imagine it would be the same as being in a guild (which I do know about)..
I think Zombiekitten pretty well hit the nail on the head. It does come down to the clan member knowing better, and is very apparent that you are nice, otherwise you would not have even given any of it a second thought after it happened.
Submitted by FreeRadikal on Wed, 02/27/2013 - 16:30
Thanks guys! :)
Submitted by Vix_Sundown on Wed, 02/27/2013 - 16:32
I think apologies in general are usually a good thing. And the fact you were concerned about that person's feelings shows you mean it.
BTW I hate the term "clan". It either sounds nerdy or like you're in the KKK. And "Guild" sounds super-nerdy (no offense to Az!). I hate telling people, "I'm in this thing called a CLAN. It's a video game group." That usually gets me a blank stare, or a puzzled look. It's annoying! Maybe we should be called The Tribe :)
Submitted by Az on Wed, 02/27/2013 - 17:30
lol, no offense taken! I have to say though, I do like the word 'tribe'. Has more of a "kick ass" feel to it :D
Submitted by zombiekitten on Wed, 02/27/2013 - 17:41
Tribe sounds more badass for sure! I usually just say "group" when talking to non-gamers.
Submitted by Matt Likes Beer on Wed, 02/27/2013 - 21:29
I refer to it as a cult.gif "74")
Submitted by zombiekitten on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 09:00
Lol! I am stealing that!!
Submitted by CiaranORian on Thu, 02/28/2013 - 09:41
Clan, or clann (pronounced clon) is the Irish word for "family".