I know what you’re thinking. Hell, I even thought it myself: all the good shit was already released for the year and we can lay back, take it easy, and wait for Santa’s fat ass to drop a sackful of loot under the tree. Well, amigo, ol’ Sarcasmo still has a trick or two up his sleeve and if you choose to let this new release article pass by unread then some hot chick is going to ask you “Hey gamer nerd, what’s new in gameland this week?” You won’t know because you didn’t bother to find out, so you make some crazy shit up, she totally busts you, and then she throws her eggnog in your face. So, if your improvisational skills are far superior to mine, or you like eggnog facials, then read no further. As for the rest of us? We return to Skyrim on the leathery wings of DLC, take our third tour of Pirate Island, Sony and Nintendo play catch-up, and the PC gets another high-flying pirate adventure.
New Releases: Week of December 3rd
Submitted By SarcasmoJones on Mon, 12/03/2012 - 10:45
Multiplatform
Far Cry 3
Imagine yourself in a lush tropical paradise with good friends and plenty of drugs. Now imagine that you are stranded on that island, pirates kidnapped your friends, and the drugs turned out to be a bad idea. Welcome to Far Cry 3! Players assume the role of Jason Brody, whose journey of self-discovery was hijacked by pirates and drug runners. Jason must rescue his lamewad friends from being sold into slavery and keep one step ahead of the bad guys by any means available: ziplines, vehicles, parachutes, jet skis, guns, explosives, sharkskin wallets...whatever. Far Cry 3 is just as large as the second game, spanning two tropical islands. Developer Ubisoft promised a more focused experience: no more wandering around lost in the jungle. Players can return to paradise, and burn it down, starting December 4th on Xbox 360 and PS3.
Microsoft
Skyrim: Dragonborn
Bethesda welcomes you back to the land of full-priced DLC with the newest Skyrim adventure: Dragonborn. The third Skyrim add on invites players to follow in the steps of the first Dragonborn, who is also a Dragon Priest. Rumor has it that at least part of the new DLC is set in Morrowind, and the Morag Tong, Dunmer assassins, were verified as enemies so there may be some truth to this rumor. Other new antagonists include werebears, giant lurkers escaped from the realm of Hermaeus Mora, new dragons, and a new Dwemer automaton best described as “a walking ballista.” Other new goodies include the ability to enchant staffs, a poison rune spell, two unique scimitars, waterwalking, three new summoning spells, and a top-secret shout. Say no more, count me in already! This DLC drops, exclusively for the Xbox 360, on December 4th.
Sony
Mass Effect Trilogy Compilation
This trilogy is already available for Microsoft gamers. Sony gamers can now enjoy all three Mass Effect games in one collection, just like the rest of us. PS3 players can play Commander Shepard’s saga, from his exciting first encounter with the Reapers all the way to ME3’s legendary letdown of a conclusion, starting December 4th, for about $60.
Nintendo
Marvel Avengers: Battle For Earth
Nintendo’s newest console gets Ubisoft’s newest brawler. Fight as your favorite Marvel hero or villain. The character list includes Spiderman, Captain America, Thor, The Hulk, Dr. Strange, Iron Man, Loki, Dr. Doom, The Human Torch, Venom, Iceman, Storm, Wolverine, Phoenix, Black Widow, Scarlet Witch, Magneto, and Hawkeye. The “Ultimate Superhero Brawler” arrives December 4th for the Wii U.
PC
Air Buccaneers HD
The 2Old2Play HD Remake of the Week is a Steam PC download. Although Air Buccaneers is only three years old, Ludocraft is giving this slow-motion Viking dirigible combat spectacular the HD treatment. Cannons, balloons, and funny hats are available for download, via Steam, starting December 5th.