False Labor?

LynnyrdSkynyrd

Shared on Mon, 12/03/2007 - 09:29
WTF? I feel totally duped. Ha ha! I guess this just goes to show that babies are definitely NOT predictable. The wife has been experiencing the Braxton-Hicks false labor for months now - random tensing up of all abdominal muscles as an involuntary preparation for labor contractions. But this was something entirely different altogether. I promise.

So the story is this: In order to keep her blood pressure down, my wife has been drinking Dandelion Root Tea (yea, that's what I said...). And while she has kept her BP low, the Dandelion Root tea has a side effect... it, well, it's a bit of a laxative. And we all know what that means. The stomach pains and indigestion eventually mounted to the point where my wife had crippling tummy aches that got so bad that they actually induced pre-labor contractions. Damn you, Dandelions! So, do me a favor... if you see a dandelion growing... kick it for me, please. Thanks.

A few months ago, I bought my wife a package of 10 prenatal massages (buying them in a package did two things: 1) they ended up being cheaper, like $75 for 90 minute massages that would normally be $90 or so, and b) a gift like this gets me and my arthritic drummer hands off the hook. ha ha). Anyway, so, the wife had one of her last sessions the morning after our pre-labor night. The masseuse had good and bad news.

The good news: My wife's body showed signs to the masseuse of preparedness. Her spine and pelvis is very relaxed and loose. These are good signs for getting ready for labor. Her body was very responsive to the massage work. The masseuse found very little traces of toxins, or the "knots" that we typically would find in an otherwise not relaxed person's body. So, that's good. She said, "you are DEFINITELY ready to have this baby, but..."

The bad news: The masseuse said she really picked up on the energy of this baby, er, fetus. And above anything else, could sense that this baby, for all intensive purposes, is NOT ready to come out... yet.

Ha ha! Gosh-darn stubborn little Saggitarius! Man, are we in for it or what?

So, if you're a Saggitarius, let me know what we're in for. Thanks.

Comments

CapnHun's picture
Submitted by CapnHun on Mon, 12/03/2007 - 09:51
Waiting to be ready is tough, especially if it is your first. But it is well worth it, MUCH easier to give birth to if the baby is ready. Oh and LS, my concoction was dandelion root, oats, stinging nettle and blackberry leaf but I didn't drink enough of it to have the laxative effect you spoke of.
CapnHun's picture
Submitted by CapnHun on Mon, 12/03/2007 - 09:54
Oh yeah, you can tell the difference between false labor and true by this: When one of those contractions puts her on the floor in pain...she is ready.
Durty's picture
Submitted by Durty on Mon, 12/03/2007 - 10:41
My father and grandfather are both "Sagies", if they are any indication...you are going to have a ladies man on your hands, lol.

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