Dad Spam - Idea courtesy of JeepChick77

So, JeepChick77 regularly posts up funnies she gets from her Dad.

I received the following from my own father this morning, unfortunately not quite as funny:

"Thank you for the lovely Christmas surprise that you and your other half bestowed on your mother! It was very much appreciated by your mother who was over the moon with delight, to learn that your other half refused her Christmas gifts and gave them away! You do realise of course, that santa`s sack will be empty next year and that only deserving little boys and girls get presents?
 
Your sister informed me and I passed it on to your mother, that you were in the huff because she didn`t phone you on your birthday! So what, you are only 30 or is it 3? Sometimes I get all confused with age!
Anyway, if it was your intention to alienate yourselves and burn all your bridges behind you, you have done a remarkable job!
 
Last year I made a mistake and made several apologies to your other half that apparently fell on deaf ears! Perhaps I hit a nerve at the time and it is still a painfull reminder! On the other side of the coin, it was not our fault that you both got yourselves into a situation and I do understand when you say that you were not feeling very festive but it is easier to lay the blame elsewhere!
 
You have a nice new year, that is of course if you are feeling new yearish and once you stop feeling sorry for yourself and grow up, you might just realise that you are not the only one with financial problems but most people don`t use it as an excuse to take out their frustrations on others!"

It's nice to know that my dysfunctional fanily is all my fault, just before the New Year :D

Still, in true Scottish style, I shall endeavour to drink this off my mind, and pay the price tomorrow - I hope everyone does the same thing, and has as enjoyable a Hogmanay as I intend to!