I'm a Social NONsmoker

I’ve been trying to quit not smoking.

It’s much harder than I thought, though. I‘ve worked on breaking it down into tasks which really is just a fancy word for obstacles standing in my way of a successful smoking life. Essentially, my main issues are: cost, taste, social stigma, and desire. But, with a good plan and dedication, I can start smoking soon and make it stick.

First, the money issue – I hate burning money both figuratively and literally. In fact, I can’t say I’ve ever actually burned money literally (although in Chemistry we burned a particular compound that has an ash type product that actually is used in the money making process – really a backwards approach, though, to burning money). But burning money figuratively remains just as bad. With a choice of Marlboro as my brand of choice, I estimate a pack to run an average of $3.50 with a goal of one pack per day which will run me about $1300 per year. Each pack contains 20 cigarettes, so at $3.50 per pack, that’s about eighteen cents per cigarette. Each time I light up, I’ll burn about eighteen cents up in under five minutes. That’s like burning money, but not enough money to get in the way of my goal.

One real hangup, though, is that I don’t actually like the taste of cigarettes – it’s kinda like taking my shoes off at the end of a long day and then licking them… for five minutes. And, with the added benefit of soaking my clothes in dishwater then wearing them. The smell and taste turns me off, but I figure if I stick to it I can tear down the sensitive membranes in my nose so that I’m no longer offended. Time and dedication remains my only obstacle here.

These days, a larger social stigma attaches itself to smoking than 40 years ago. With the anti-smoking campaigns attempting to ruin perfectly good fun, and the constant drives to stamp out this fun, exciting activity, I feel a lot of pressure to not pick it up. But, I love electronics and sometimes eye voice boxes with jealousy and envy. Perhaps a lifetime campaign can lead to my very own box? Maybe I can even request the voice of Darth Vader?

I don’t want to smoke, to be perfectly honest. That’s the toughest obstacle standing in my way. I always believed that when you truly want something, you can just do it, so I feel that my underlying desire is to remain a non-smoker. I got some tapes and I’m wearing the patch to try to work myself up to a dependency on Nicotine, but I don’t know if it’ll take. I’m up to 2 patches a day.

Right now, I’m just a social non-smoker, but I can kick that habit. I think.