And the penis...

Five out of ten people are diagnosed with a penis.

After being diagnosed with a penis, 99.999% of patients find they have also been infected with testicles as well.

The only known cure for penis will require the penis to be turned inside out and shoved inside the body, the scar can sometimes slightly resemble a vagina.

Generally a person with a penis dies with a penis, no one is known to have lived for more than 120 years after being diagnosed with a penis.

Most people diagnosed with a penis were born with this medical condition.

Around 11-13 years of age the penis takes control of it's host, redirecting all thought processes to first move through the testicles before the brain.

9/10 people with penises become addicted to vagina's around the 11-13 age range and will stop at nothing to immerse itself in one.

1/10 people with a penis will become addicted to other penises instead.

Penises come in many sizes: small, medium, large, and huge....vaginal hosts prefer the medium and large ones most often.

When confronted a penis will try and puke on you, be careful.

Penises can expand to up to 3 times their natural size. Be alarmed, it will try and puke on you when it does this.

Penises can be passed on to offspring. A person with a penis only has a 50% chance of having a normal penisless child.

Millions of people die every year with a penis.

As penises age they forget how to expand and puke, the testicles begin to sag and droop to the floor, you may accidentally sit on them when this happens.