SarcasmoJones's blog

 Once a month, usually on Saturday, I take my Basset, Mack, to the Paw Spa to get his nails clipped. I got Mack from the North Texas Basset Rescue people, and he is afflicted with a severe case of separation anxiety. Anyway, the fucking Paw Spa doesn't accept credit cards, so I stopped off at the 7-11 to hit the ATM and grab a Big Gulp...they were on sale for 69 cents. While I was in the store, Mack freaks the fuck out and urinates in my cup holder...so I set my drink on the dash to go get some paper towels.

Okay, so I have been putting a lot of gameplay vids on YouTube lately. Out of curiosity I checked the transcripts of some of the videos, and not only do they not match what I said, they're fucking hilarious. I don't know if my drawl is throwing off their word detector, but the transcript is not even close to what I said. I'll use my Titanfall video as an example:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7WKp1BGcOA

0:00

sir caspar Jones told find a comment

0:03

 I use Twitter to discuss many different things: gaming, politics, and heavy metal. Okay, I use Twitter for three things. As a way to riase awareness about Twitter's birthday they released an app that allows you to find your very first tweet. Here's mine from March 11, 2010:

"What happened to Splinter Cell:Conviction? It was supposed to be here in February..."

I guess we know which comes first in the Jones house.

 This may be one of the few places on earth where you can place in the top 1% and still be slower than 5 of your fucking friends...it's a love/hate thing.

At least it would have if the picture hadn't fucked up. I reckon it's still a mystery.

I have 9500 unread e-mails...which I have no intention of reading.

The first full-length novel I ever read was The Shining...I was 10 at the time.

I hate R&B but I like rap.

I have an iTunes account but no iPod.

My favorite band is AC/DC.

One of my farts once caused a grown man to vomit.

I want to move to Seattle to get away from the oppressive heat and political climate of Texas.

I drive a Honda Civic...but I want to get a Leaf.

I Google myself at least once a week.

 Now that the GOTY article is live I thought I would share my favorite "moments" from 2013. Not necessarily the best games, just the most prominent WTF or "holy shit that was cool" moments from games I played this year.

Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon: Meet the Dragon. Coming to in a cave on an unfamiliar island, Rex Power Colt hesitates as he exits the cave, just as a blob of viscera drops in front of him. He looks up to see what made the mess and the Blood Dragon's big fucking head is hanging directly over the mouth of the cave finishing off his snack.

The XBox One Tour finally made its official stop in North Texas, in Dallas' eclectic Deep Ellum area. They were passing out all sorts of prizes, shirts, and even an XBox One. I spent several hours there today and got a good taste of some next-gen gaming.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4BeeVmokYc